A SHOUT-OUT TO ADOPTIVE PARENTS! . . .

As we are in the midst of National Adoption Awareness Month, I want to give a “Shout Out” to all of you dedicated adoptive parents who follow my posts. As an adoptive parent for the past 31 years, I am fully aware of the highs and lows—and everything in between—in the experience of being an adoptive parent. We adopted our children, Michael (now 38) and Sara (now 30) from India in 1994 and 1999 respectively. I believe I have learned more from them than they have learned from me. For many of you, this is likely true as well. As an intercountry adoptive parent in particular, I have learned to become more sensitive and understanding of the challenges faced by individuals of color in our society, particularly in the Deep South where we live. I have learned about the beauty of Indian culture and of how scores of Indian nationals have enriched our nation. Most of all, I have learned how the universal language of love transcends cultures.

For those of you Dads & Moms who are currently struggling through “deep waters” in your parenting journey, I want to let you know that you are not forgotten. Along with the many heartwarming adoption stories I’ve known over the past 30 years, I’ve also been personally aware of a fair number of heartbreaking stories—the adoption process that did not work out; the adoption that had to be disrupted; the child who you loved with your whole heart who rejected that love; the prodigal who still hadn’t returned home. Please know this—and I do not want to sound trite here—YOUR CHILD’S STORY IS NOT OVER, and neither is your story. Adoptive families have unique struggles and challenges not faced by traditional families, and we parents need to give ourselves an extra measure of grace because of this.

For those of you (and this really means all of you!) who have given your child a loving, nurturing forever home—I salute you! Whether domestic or intercountry, adoption has given countless numbers of children the incredible opportunity to experience lives filled with hope for the present and the future, even as they have to work through the difficult journey of grief over their past. Adoption is a holy and sacred thing. Parents, I encourage you to “keep on keeping on” as you celebrate the victories and wrestle through the pain, knowing that you have given your children open doors that they would likely have never experienced otherwise.

Dr. Mark Andrews