May is National Foster Care Month . . Here’s to You, Foster Parents!

Currently, there are approximately 390,000 foster children in the United States. That number is down from nearly 450,00 ten years ago. There are numerous reasons for this reduction, but one main reason I want to focus on is the long-term dedication of foster parents who stay in the trenches even when parenting is extremely difficult. For numerous reasons, over 40 percent of first-time foster parents throw in the towel within their first year of fostering. It’s a really tough, sometimes thankless calling. But a calling it is. I say it’s a “calling of the heart.” In most states, the days are largely gone where foster parents were allowed to warehouse sometimes five or six kids at a time and get a handsome monthly per-diem. That’s certainly not a calling of the heart. Instead, the true calling of the heart is one that often involves sleep- deprived nights, weathering major meltdowns, endless doctor, therapist, caseworker and court appointments.

Foster parents are true heroes! Not only do they open their homes to children who often display multitude of emotional and behavioral challenges, but they also allow numerous other individuals and entities—caseworkers, CASA workers, behavioral aides, therapists and psychologists, school personnel and doctors—into their lives. They typically deal with a child welfare system that is chronically broken—a system whose’ on-the-ground staff is overworked, understaffed and under trained. Yet, these parents soldier on because of their calling to make a difference in the life of a hurting child—a difference that can hopefully help that child to break the generational dysfunction of their biological families.

Yes, foster parents are true heroes! They are the people who read bedtime stories to a child that’s never been read to. They are the people who will rock a 12-year-old to sleep who has never known that comforting feeling. They are the ones who help the 10-year-old learn to brush his teeth properly. They are the ones who overlook the shame expressed by an 8-year- old who wets the bed every night. And yes, they are the ones who potty-train the 5-year-old who was never taught proper toileting habits.

Are you one of those foster parent heroes? Yes, I know you don’t consider yourself a hero—but you are. Are you someone who knows a foster parent hero? Then reach out to them and tell them “Thank You!” for what they provide to the most vulnerable population in our society. Foster parent heroes, I salute you—not just during National Foster Care month—but every day of the year!